Balotelli and Nasri CAPTION COMPETITION – Win a FREE Man City Away Kit!
8 Feb
Think you’re funny? Want to win a free City away kit? Then you’ve found the right place.
Umbro have kindly sponsored this caption competition with a full City away kit – shirt, shorts and socks – and all you have to do is make me laugh. It really is that simple.
Below is a picture of Mario Balotelli and Samir Nasri. Think of a witty caption, post it below as a comment and whoever I judge to be the most humorous will be the recipient of this fantastic prize.
The rules are straightforward:
- You must leave a valid email address as this is how you will be contacted
- There must be no swearing. Any comments that include bad language will be removed.
The closing date for entries is 8pm on Wednesday 15th February and the winner will be announced in an article published shortly afterwards.
This competition has been very kindly sponsored by Umbro. Feel free to check out their fantastic website here.
Best of luck!
Mario: Im in talks about having my own show – what do you think of Balo-Telly ??
Samir : Not much mate!
Mario, I am clenching so hard there is no chance you’re getting that firework up there.
“So what is it that this see-saw training is supposed to do for us again?”
‘Sorry Mario, I knew I shouldn’t have had the beans for lunch”
Nasri: and despite Arsenal being outside the top 4 and having not won a trophy since 2006 they still accuse me of moving for money…
Least its too cold for those bibs today Mario !!
Nasri: You’re right! You do look like Ian Wright from the side!
(Mario to nasri) he he he nasri laughs his head one
Nasri: I’m a little teapot, short and stout. Here’s my handle, here’s my handle, hang on, I’m a sugar bowl!
Ballo: Che cosa è una ciotola dello zucchero?
Chappy just showed the lads a picture of Wayne Rooney’s latest hairstyle.
Balotelli:Yeah, we go to Fiji. Hide out for a year. Maybe change our names. Get jobs as bartenders. And imma call you Kiko.
Why are you laughing Samir?…..I am better than messi
And i told Rio”Ferguson couldnt afford a hair on my body”
“Anyway ,who would be stupid enough to pay for my shavings anyway?”
I dont care how many fireworks you can get me Mario……your not taking my sister out
come on sammi, tell us the truth….is wenger really a peado? I’ll wind up the toure’s when they get back
Ok balo. Tell me who cut your hair. I’ll sort them out !!
hey mario, how does that Tevez wiggle go again he wont be back to show me….
Nasri: My haircut looks stupid? Seriously?!
Mario: Yeah, seriously… Sami, why are you laughing? I don’t get it.
Who dressed you today Mario, you managed to put your jacket on the right way.
“Zat leetle trick wiz ze serviette, poop, vanish! You can do wiz Carlos no?”
Nasri: Hey Mario do u want to be next successor to Capello as england manager? Mario: Let’s see Sams Mate, it depends if I be next manager can I stomp on Parker’s face again, and make it more deformed than it already is? This time I’ll finish him off and it won’t be accidental on the pitch! I can get him cleaning the toilets in wembley and then I can finally send harry to Jail!
Mario: I love my song…Oooh Balotelli, he’s a striker,good at
Samir: (breaks wind)Farts!
Mario: “Samir, the mohawk…you’re doing it wrong”
Nasri to Mario:
Ok show me again Mario, the ball was under your top and now it’s disappeared, your like that Dynamo dude!
mario:can you believe rio said they was the better team in the 1-6 defeat
Hey Samir,just one more red and I’m on the colours !
ive just dumped in micahs manbag
Nasri ‘come on Mario, we’ve been playing this first to blink game since full time on Saturday ‘
It was me,I ate all the pies
samir to mario
put your hands on her hips like this
thats how rooney grabs a granny
C’mon mario we”ll practice your next goal celebration, now copy me, that’s it, you’ve almost got it, it’s called a smile!
Hey Naz had a valentines poem for rio rejected by moonpig i mean whats wrong with “united are red , city are blue, we played at old trafford and stuck six past you …??
Balotelli: Samir, if you have to go THAT bad I know a great place at Xaverian College.
Balotelli: Samir, if you have to go THAT bad I know a great place at Xaverian College. ::zooms off in his Bentley::
(I posted this the first time but I guess using the pointy brackets removes the text between them!)
Nasri: “Look Mario, when you score you have to smile like this….”
Mario: “How would you know?”
…..so you dutched oven her?!?!
Samir: According to Chris Smalling we`re going to bottle it!
Mario: Chris who?
Mario: “You know Sami, sometimes I feel people just don’t understand me or listen to what I have to say”
Nasri: “About half past six”
Mario : Nice one Samir but I thought the Kiwi’s did the Haka !!
Mario: ” I believe it was Oscar Wilde that said – A dreamer is one who can only find his way by moonlight, and his punishment is that he sees the dawn before the rest of the world.”
Sami: “Fair enough, shall we pick up the cones then?”
Nasri: Now what do I have to say to get an eight game rest?
Samir: Not in my life time
“I seen you doing magic tricks after the Fulham game, when are you going to grow up Mario? Haha!”
“You can talk, you’ve been doing disappearing acts all season!”
So, which one of us will be next England manager ?
“…Ayyyyyyyyyyyy Macarena”
Mario: hey Samir, did you hear the latest news? Tottenham actually think they can win the league
Samir!: hahahahahaha. You’re kidding me right?
Mario: Samir, do you know where I can get an Easter Bunny costume from? I’m getting another itching to treat Manchester!
Mario: Hey Samir, do you know what is the best couple of players in Spain right now?
Nasri: yeah, Silva and Xavi right?
Mario: No, Fergie and Redknapp playing poker in Majorca
Balo: Are we getting a new player? Seriously.
Nasri: Yeah (strains) Van Der Faart! (messes a little)
Balo: That’s more like Torres!
Mario: Lets play roshambo
Nasri: Okay
Mario: I go first
Nasri: How do we play this?
Mario: Just close your eyes you won’t feel a thing
RUSH HOUR:4 Starring Samir Chan & Mario Tucker. “Do You Understand the Words That Are Coming Out of My Mouth?”
Nasri – “He drives around moss side with a wallet full of cash…” (farts)
Mario – “Sounds like you walk around the pitch with pockets full of ass!”
“Why you smiling, Sami?”
“I just realized why its always you, Mario.”
SAMIR – You speak French as well!
Mario: you see…..everything I do gets covered by the press and gets blasted all over the internet….. i’m like a rock star man.
Samir: rubbish, you’re not that interesting ! It’s not like they’d take a photo of you right now, post it on the web and create some crazy caption competition is it.
Mario: They would ! City fans are so brilliant that they follow us everywhere on the net…… but mostly me…… Of course, they’d photoshop you out of the picture unless you pretend to squeeze one out like me !
Sami: He mario, you know that tube of super glue micah had? well I have put a load of it on the bottom of your boots!
Mario: You can wipe that grin off your face as I put a load of it on the bottom of that jacket you are wearing!
Nasri: I’m wearing my bird’s knickers right now…
Mario: So am I.
Nasri: “Ave you erd zat zay say I erm zay most boring partner to have in training?”
Mario: “Why Always Me!”
ohhh sammirrr, sammirrr…would you like 9 grand, i would give it you ’cause i can
Did you just say you think Harold from Neighbours should be the next England manager?
Samir.see if i stand like this it does dangle out the
bottom of my shorts
‘Samir and Mario laughed in glee as they realised they had found the formula for Premier League victory – Pantilimon as target man’
Mario: Help me put my bib on, they’re tricky little things. 3 headholes but only 1 head. I don’t understand.
Samir: Not now, I’m doing my best Franck Ribéry impression! Ugly or what?!
Mario: I’ve got an idea, lets send in an england managment request for stuart pearce!
Samir: Yeah! hahaha he will never get it
Nasri: Mario, Imagine Fergie’s face when we win the league.
Balotelli: Hell no Nana, seeing Dracula is scary enough.
What Samir didn’t realise was that Nigel De Jong was crouched down behind him and Mario was going in for the kill.
How’s it go Sami, it’s a jump to the left, then a step to the right. Then it’s put your hands on you hips. It’s called the time Warp Mario.
Mario:
“And then Federic Veseli said I should join them too…”
Samir:
“Hahahaha. There’s more chance of me going back to Arsenal!”
Ballotelli: how do you like Manchester mate ?
Nasri: it’s buzzin!!
Mario: It will be a “Space Party”
Nasri: Space???
Mario: I have it all planned, we go to Russia, they put the team on a rocket, they take care of all the details. It will be out of this world!!
Nasri: Space???…..Does the Gaffer know?
It was all awkward smiles when Sami and Mario turned up wearing the same outfit!
Nasri:- What madcap adventure are you up to today Mario?
Balotelli:- Handing out money, getting the beers in, letting off fireworks. Just a normal Mario day
Mario:- You should have seen Mancini’s face when i let that firework off in his office!!!
Nasri:- So you say Rooney thinks he’s better than Messi?
Mario:- Everyone knows I’m the best player in the world
Nasri:- Best at missing gsmes anyway!!!
Nasri:- Have you heard the latest?
Balotelli:- Is Van Der Sar coming out of retirement?
Nasri:- Yes and Neville, Charlton and Law. We’ll never win the league now!!!!
samir you dona understadia mi italiano, i said go ana sit on de flags in a de corner, not on ia tha corner flaggia no a wonda you smilea that stick eez a mita higha…
Roberto Mancini shouts (off frame)”Is important you work harder very much.. is football”
Mario: “So I handed this old toothless homeless woman on the street a thousand quid and she said – not tonight Wayne, I’m still sore from the last time”
Nasri: “Is it true you’re really crazy Mario?”
Mario: “Yeah, I’m crazy like a fox”
Nasri: “Actually a fox is a very cunning and intelligent animal”
Mario: “Oh, sorry, I meant stoat”
Yes ok Mario you can come to my party, but if you need to use the bathroom you go to the school next door understood?
Mario-”I wonder if those motorway Double Yellow Line Painters have noticed their machine is missing yet.”
Nasri – You put your left foot in, your left foot out, your left foot in and you shake it all about, You do the hokey cokey……
Mario – And there was me thinking YOU were teaching ME how to tackle…..
Nasri: Mario, Mario, Mario.
Balotelli: What Samir!
Nasri: Wanna see the Irish jig? Look…
Balotelli: haha, jig…. That’s the way to get the Irish to like you French again.
Nasri: What?….
Haha!
Maro,I didn’t think it would upset you so much that you’d spray with pepper spray and ram a firework up my ass, just for saying you and Micah used the same barber.
Mario: Hey Samir, you look like a lesbian.
Nasri: You mean the kind that inhabit prisons? I must be your type then!
Mario: “Do an impression of Pantilimon pretending to be average height!”
Samir: “Is this good? Or does it just look like I need a poo?”
What did you just call me?
“Dont step back Sami,the FA might review this picture after training and ban you”
Mario; ‘Hey Samir that Carlos Tevez DVD you got me for Christmas I can not get it to play’
Samir; ‘Mario it is a very common problem!’.
Samir,
Was that you,Jeez what a smell ?!
Mario-”So I asked the barber for a Mohican and he Scalped me.”
I spy with my little eye something beginning with T.no it’s not Tevez
Balo “how do you think Mancini and Tevez are going to sort this out”
Nasri “Mancini will get him I’m the office and say ‘come lick my balls like the dog you are’”
Balo “how will he stand.”
Nasri “just like this, funny yes?”
Samir:Look behind you!
Mario: It’s Wimblydon?
Samir: No, it’s Tevez
Mario: to get a haircut like that you must have got into a fight with a lawnmower
Sammy: I could say the same about you my friend.
Mario: why always me?
Mario, have you farted?
Samir, nooo, I can’t smell anything!
Samir, it was you wasn’t it!?
Mario, why always me?
Samir, great mate
they get me confused with micah … wait until i turn round they will think im ruud gullit !!
Nasri ” look Mario this is how you do the River dance! “
“Hey nas did you leave the gate open,” “Yes why you ask,” “because tevez has got out agan”.